He's offered to tell jokes, but Siri can tell jokes, too.
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Siri and Cortana already tell jokes and contain endearing Easter eggs.
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He was constantly asking it to play music and tell jokes.
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"He … tries to tell jokes that are funny," Emma Kasich said.
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Others were forced to tell jokes as they were being assaulted.
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We even saw a UFC clip in which you tell jokes.
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It can tell jokes about old people being set in their ways.
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It doesn't tell jokes so much as let people be authentically witty.
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We tell jokes that aren't funny and laugh with our eyes closed.
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Why would I want to tell jokes to a bunch of strangers?
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" "We don't like it because we have to tell jokes about it.
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So, for me it wasn't a leap to tell jokes about it, honestly.
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Over and over, as children do when they first learn to tell jokes.
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He liked to tell jokes -- sometimes the same jokes over and over again.
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When you try to tell jokes to someone, they just don't get it.
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We can't stay mad at each other because we tell jokes to each other.
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"It's fun to share secrets, tell jokes, flirt, complain about fellow workers' peccadilloes," wrote Warsh.
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Miller's' face was visibly ashen, even on the cheap screen, and he didn't tell jokes.
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She has not proven the ability to tell jokes back-to-back for an hour.
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It can tell jokes and stories, make memes out of photos, and deliver a horoscope.
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One that wants to shoot the breeze, tell stories, tell jokes, and learn about you.
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She is toothless but wears bright dentures, and is quick to laugh and tell jokes.
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Bottom line for Tony ... a society where you can't tell jokes freely isn't a good thing.
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He's a pretty big goofball, just hearing him laugh a lot and loves to tell jokes.
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WASHINGTON — A comedian has agreed to tell jokes at this year's White House Correspondents' Association dinner.
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People say things that they don't mean literally: they tell jokes and they use ironic expressions.
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People tell jokes to one another, but very slowly and often more loudly than is required.
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When we see each other we smile and tell jokes and share tidbits of our lives.
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She has not proven the ability to tell jokes, back to back, for an hour to nobody.
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In "No One," he encouraged them to tell jokes, none of which were particularly revealing (or funny).
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She has not proven the ability to tell jokes back-to-back for an hour to nobody.
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These women tell jokes for a living why don't they concentrate on real things like Miss Universe competitions?
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MCs tell jokes to a cold crowd, warming them up for the more competent headliner and feature acts.
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The added bonus is that, once a song ends, you get to listen to a comedian tell jokes.
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In the tradition of the dinner, nominees are meant to tell jokes about themselves and roast their opponents.
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Once you press that button, however, it can provide helpful information, read the news and — yes — tell jokes.
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It's so nice because we really connect and talk about our plans for the week and tell jokes.
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Children can ask the system to play music, answer questions, tell jokes or remember information they tell it.
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I think it's possible to tell jokes about people without anyone thinking it's from a specific political agenda.
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There are tons of kid-friendly apps for them that tell jokes or serve up fun facts about animals.
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Apple's voice AI can't tell jokes, play games or turn on an Apple TV — or your favorite Netflix show.
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Brzezinski also hit at those criticizing Wolf, noting that she had been hired to tell jokes at the dinner.
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Five comics who can fill arenas might share the same stage, or Dave Chappelle could tell jokes until dawn.
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Something I see a lot is where the bridesmaids only tell jokes and stories that only the bride understands.
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" He also recalled how Bush, his lifelong friend, loved to tell jokes, but "he could never, never remember a punchline.
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She's funny, she loves to tell jokes and play jokes on people," Jennifer gushes of Zoey, adding that she's "sassy.
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Capricorn risings have an unmistakable seriousness about them—even when they tell jokes, they're deadpan, which only makes it funnier!
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In another Netflix special, Whitney Cummings offers a rebuttal, trotting out a robot that looks like her to tell jokes.
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The simplest thing this Spider-Man can do is tell jokes — he seems to have an infinite simply of eye-rollers.
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Just like streamers in the US and Europe, these online entertainers sing, tell jokes, or just play video games for fans.
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Legendary psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud theorized that comedians often tell jokes as a kind of relief system from some kind of anxiety.
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It&aposs programmed to give homework lessons and tell jokes, and parents can remotely talk to and monitor children through the robot.
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It's a great way to tell jokes as she comments on slides that mostly cover smartphone-related grievances and musings about technology.
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Some 16% of women thought it was acceptable to tell jokes or stories of a sexual nature at work, the study said.
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The Chinese government requires him to submit scripts in advance of his commercial performances — that gets him a permit to tell jokes.
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For 99 cents, you can hear the Hollywood star read you the news, give you a weather report and even tell jokes.
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The characters on 30 Rock are mostly excuses to tell jokes, but they all have more personality than the gang on Family Guy.
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"He just tries to tell jokes that he thinks are funny, but they're mostly just funny to us because they're dumb," Emma said.
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I love to sing, I love to tell jokes, and I love to host people — as Andy knows, I love to have parties.
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We all know how to talk to people, how to be casual and friendly, how to tell jokes and how to be human.
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The sex robot industry is a burgeoning one, with manufacturers building ever-more-sophisticated models that can tell jokes and even quote Shakespeare.
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The Alexa intelligent assistant, which runs on it, can play music and tell jokes, and now Google, Apple and Microsoft are copying it.
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In the video, you can hear Google Home answer (or not) various questions, tell jokes (badly) and give its take on the upcoming election.
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Down to tell jokes and be the life of the party, but also completely disbelieving and thunderstruck when the big dream finally comes true.
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Bodow: We've always believed — under Jon [Stewart], and now very similarly with Trevor — that we're here to tell jokes first and make points second.
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I tell jokes about blacks in the church, which make white people very uncomfortable, but they know I'm telling the truth, so they laugh.
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We cannot hold elected leaders to a lower standard than we hold people who make movies, star in movies, tell jokes and deliver news.
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Today, older Somalis still gather around to tell jokes and stories or listen to well-known Somali poets, like Warsan Shire, read her poems.
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Some artworks tell jokes — Gavin Turk's "Core" (2005) is an apple core sculpture made of oil paint on bronze — and others make historical allusions.
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Judge John Hodgman Sara writes: My husband does stand-up and promised that he would never tell jokes about me onstage without prior approval.
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Mr. Macron is not chatty, keeps the media at a distance, does not tell jokes and is anything but a "normal" politician, or president.
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You can do all the basics like ask it for the weather, play music, check your calendar, tell jokes, control your smart home devices, etc.
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And if nothing else, they can tell jokes about how disastrously everything went last time (because, after all, most first-time Oscar hosts are terrible).
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Your kids can ask Alexa to play music, answer questions, read stories, tell jokes, and more, and every response will have younger ears in mind.
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Jibo, a precursor to Amazon's Alexa, has the body language of the Pixar lamp; it's meant to tell jokes keep you company throughout the day.
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He should capitalize on this rare moment, hire a great writer who can tell jokes, and deliver the stand-up comedy routine of his life.
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He was popular on the party's fund-raising circuit and among his colleagues, but he sought to show he could do more than tell jokes.
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Some 28% of men globally think it's acceptable to tell jokes or stories of a sexual nature in the office, an international survey has found.
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Some young people spend their summers telling ghost stories around a campfire; those in Kids 'n Comedy's indoor programs (where campfires are discouraged) tell jokes.
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So it's a surprise to see him tell jokes about the dark consequences of his addiction to pornography or the excruciating details of family court.
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As a young man from a modest upbringing, Hope worked as a butcher's assistant and shoe salesman, and would perform and tell jokes in the park.
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The Echo Dot Kids Edition features a more kid-friendly version of the Alexa voice assistant that will play music, answer questions, read stories and tell jokes.
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That's usually a respite in an election year because the candidates always attend and tell jokes in good humor — whether it comes naturally to them or not.
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They're much more likely to be impressed by your ability to tell jokes about this week's news, or the effort you put into learning about their interests.
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Because of a neurological disease that made it hard for him to walk, he couldn't get around much, but he still loved to sing and tell jokes.
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But on Thursday, after Melania Trump made a very puzzling fashion choice, Jimmy Kimmel proved he can scratch his head and tell jokes at the same time.
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The less comforting truth is that when a company has a trillion dollars and commands the lives of thousands of people, it doesn't have to tell jokes.
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No. But it's a wonderful time to paint, tell jokes, and have a late night conversation about your feelings with a friend and have some big laughs.
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The camera reads a set of smart cards that will trigger the bear to tell jokes, teach kids curious facts, and other specific learning and playing activities.
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We play and tell jokes and work well together, but if we ever disrespect each other than we lose that partnership and friendship that makes this show work.
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He may toss on a wig and tell jokes for a living, but, like so many drag queens committed to their respective specialties, Johnson takes dance gratifyingly seriously.
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Just by saying Alexa's name, your child(ren) can have her play their favorite music, read stories via Audible, answer questions, conduct internet searches, tell jokes, and more.
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While I believe comedy can move the needle by, at the very least, raising awareness of issues, I also believe Gregory did far more than simply tell jokes.
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She liked to tell jokes, and she wasn't always great at judging her audience, so it would be good not to face political repercussions for ill-timed humor.
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Vernie can be programmed to tell jokes or rap and the cat can be playful and programmed to drink virtual milk (and then digitally fart because it's lactose intolerant).
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Indeed, Mr. Bruce, whose acerbic and profane observations about society inspired generations of comedians who wanted to do more than just tell jokes, is having a pop culture resurgence.
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The real center of this film isn't leftist politics; it's an anguished whine about how you just can't tell jokes anymore, and, like, fine, Todd Phillips, maybe you can't.
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So for example, I can have a conversation about Black Lives Matter, I can tell jokes onstage about Black Lives Matter, but why don't we talk to Patrisse Cullors?
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You know, I do improv comedy on the side, I like to tell jokes, so I just like a little bit of fun back and forth, let's have some laughs.
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They're Marconi's apprentices, and he doesn't disappoint: he shaves my face with precision, taking time between deft motions to tell jokes or offer a botched rendition to a cumbia song.
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A friend of a University of Utah student who was killed in an attempted carjacking says the man was a smart, bright and caring person who loved to tell jokes.
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If a black comedian wants to tell jokes about black people, he has a bit more of a right to do than a white person telling jokes about black people.
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For other videos in the series, the artist, in a strangely benign variation on Alÿs's bribes, paid officers, in uniform and on duty, to dance, stage arguments, and tell jokes.
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And 2014/2015, everything changed, and now I am not provocative, I don't tell jokes; you know, because I have to teach to the most sensitive student in the room.
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Thankfully, I am not the only one who seems uncomfortable talking about it—most of the other women tell jokes about their session rather than discuss it in a serious way.
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In bars further away from the glittering night life of the central city, young comics tell jokes in Cantonese, the dominant language in Hong Kong but one on the retreat elsewhere.
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Trump opted not to attend last year's Gridiron dinner, an invitation-only white-tie event where DC's journalists and politicians tell jokes and perform comedic skits poking fun at one another.
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Amazon has also recently added celebrity voices that you can buy for your Echo, like actor Samuel L. Jackson, who can do things like tell jokes and give basic weather reports.
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" Roberts, who is bald, said he thought the joke was fine because he was making it about himself, and "if you tell jokes about yourself, you can never get in trouble.
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Finally, Savioke is going to capitalize on Relay's popularity with guests to add a "mingle" function, where Relay can hang out with guests in the lobby and tell jokes or deliver treats.
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The film, directed by Hao Wu, looks at China's live-streaming culture, where hundreds of millions of people log in to watch various hosts sing, tell jokes and hustle to entertain audiences.
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Is it possible to tell jokes that punch up — the comedy term for jokes that make fun of those more powerful than the comedian — when the person delivering the joke is the president?
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Or maybe they tell jokes: If you want to see the real life hijinks of Bree and crew — and New York rent isn't a burden enough — the DUMBO studio opens on April 28th.
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But for the fact that these women are black, tell jokes about penises (one recent podcast was devoted almost entirely to the subject of Lenny Kravitz's), and have divergent taste in men (Ms.
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In fact, as President, Bush even invited Dana Carvey, who was then depicting him on "Saturday Night Live," to the White House annual Christmas party in 1992 to tell jokes at his expense.
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An animatronic Mickey in the Magic Kingdom's Town Square Theatre can tell jokes, do magic tricks, and even greet guests in various languages, but he doesn't actually engage them the way California Adventure's does.
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"Sabina was smart, witty girl who loved to tell jokes and make other people laugh," Henderson, who did not immediately respond to PEOPLE's request for comment, said in his statement to the news station.
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The two then proceed to tell jokes, and Ford's glacial delivery is absolutely brilliant, and not just because he tells a joke about ice... Conclusion: we all wish we could chill with Harrison Ford.
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Alexa can help with a lot of those, but we still rely on real humans to wire up thermostats, tell jokes, play music, discover interesting facts, carry letters, and even report the news (ahem).
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Usually these writer characters, whether directly based on the people who created them or not, are depicted as self-loathing misanthropes who tell jokes just to get through another grueling day of being a human.
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BUDAPEST (Reuters) - The robots at the Enjoy Budapest Cafe can do it all - they can serve up food and drink, tell jokes, dance with the kids or just hang out for a chat with customers.
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"Stand-up comedy is a shabby business, made up of shabby fellows like me who cross the country, stay at shabby hotels, and tell jokes they no longer find funny," he writes in the introduction.
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At this get-together, she invites funny friends such as Janeane Garofalo, Michelle Buteau and Marie Faustin to not only tell jokes but also work through the obstacles in their lives with humor and grace.
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Accessed via a smart speaker with a familiar glowing green diamond, the assistant can play music, do trivia, tell jokes, turns lights on and off (smart home!) and order different services, like food, gardening and repair.
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Anyone who publicly expresses discomfort with Louis C.K.'s reappearance has inevitably been pressured to resolve the entire extrajudicial framework of wrongs in 2018: If he can't tell jokes at the Comedy Cellar, where can he?
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" At another point, he said with no small amount of sarcasm: "'Succession' is loosely based on the Murdoch family, the same Murdoch family that has ordered me to sit here at this microphone and tell jokes.
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No matter what situation he's in, Trump will never be talented enough to tell jokes or keep his cool during interviews or spar with the hosts, but he's somehow more interesting for that, because he keeps trying.
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The one I tell jokes about what happened to me in an institution—if you want the more detailed version, you'll have to go to a show—but I was in prison and a guy raped me.
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Simple, fun digital assistant features like the ability to tell jokes have turned out to be a great way to keep kids entertained, and Google is so far the only company to really put some effort into expanding that.
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In Asia, where a youthful stand-up comedy scene is still developing, comedians in China, Hong Kong, Singapore and Malaysia are finding creative ways to tell jokes about sex and politics, while coming up against cultures of censorship and taboos.
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Efforts to disinvite speakers, punish people who tell jokes deemed offensive and regulate everything from dining hall food and Halloween costumes to the organizations that students are permitted to join are at odds with a longstanding liberal distaste for coercion.
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I am a nice guy, and I'm joyful, I love to tell jokes and so on, and I have a great sustaining group of close friends, and wonderful children, but in my heart I am more depressed than Samuel Beckett.
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What a contrast to the painfully thin-skinned Trump, who has not only lashed out at comedians who dare tell jokes about him but has even called for canceling "SNL," likely because he didn't like its jokes at his expense.
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It's impossible to overstate how much we have been conditioned to find things funny because other people are laughing — comedy is deeply social — and it requires extraordinary confidence in your material to tell jokes without the safety net of a response.
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" By now, McLellan is a pro at navigating Muslim events, understanding the unspoken do's and don'ts: Do not shake hands with the women (unless they initiate the gesture); do tell jokes about how diverse the Muslim community is; do not say "Moslem.
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I had to go through all the broken pieces and collage it together into something where I can show my audiences that I can do a lot, that I can play guitar and sing, that I can tap dance, I can tell jokes.
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Now we have computers the size of soda cans that sit in your house and control your lights, provide weather updates, solve math equations and tell jokes, all by simply speaking to them… and some of them have better jokes than my actual friends.
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" The comedian Ali Wong inspired the writer Nicole Clark to confess that she "didn't think she liked stand-up until a few years ago, when I realized the problem was the lack of comedians who look like me and tell jokes that I 'get.
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The Amazon Echo, a voice-driven cylindrical computer that sits on a table top and answers to the name Alexa, can call up music tracks and radio stations, tell jokes, answer trivia questions and control smart appliances; even before Christmas it was already resident in about 4% of American households.
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But after a harrowing meeting with Sophie Lennon, the most successful female comedian in the business (played by Jane Lynch), and getting a public dressing-down from her mother, Midge isn't in the mood to tell jokes about her parents splitting their twin beds apart after she catches them having sex.
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There's no debating that the suddenly bustling Slaver's Bay seems to have prospered under Tyrion's custodianship, so we're treated to an oddly dull game of truth or dare in the pyramid, as the Imp teaches Missandei and Grey Worm how to tell jokes and drink some of that old cougar juice.
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In my personal life and in talking with you and other people, I am a nice guy, and I'm joyful, I love to tell jokes and so on and I have a great sustaining group of close friends, and wonderful children, but in my heart I am more depressed than Samuel Beckett.
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It was where I'd vent about perceived slights, update the general public on the banalities of my existence, tell jokes to varying degrees of success, or go into a fiery rage over something that didn't really matter as a way to rid myself of the bullshit feelings that come with being a person in society.
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Let's be real: you're never too old to enjoy a book about an underwear-clad superhero who fights talking robot toilets (to name just one of the series' memorable villains.) But behind the series' potty humor (pun intended), Captain Underpants also carries a more mature comedic sensibility, with characters frequently breaking the fourth wall to tell jokes.
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Amazon Echo Show 5, $59.99 on sale (originally $89.99), available at Amazon [you save $30]There's an ever-so-slight learning curve in figuring out what Amazon's Alexa can and can't do, but once that's passed, the Echo Show can forecast the weather, read an audiobook, order a pizza, tell jokes, or any number of things Dad should find charming.
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" Foster was tweeting about Pusha's diss track, "The Story of Adidon," with his former Houston Texans teammate, Charles James, who said: "Pusha T is like that one dude who doesn't tell jokes well so he just gets personal Drake: I wrote for Kanye Pusha T: that's why your best friend about to die" Foster said he can't wait for Drake's clapback but said he's not really rooting for either side -- "Got no dog in the fight.
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And look, if our Robbie, the pride of Stoke-on-Trent, the man born to tell jokes to a clearly enraptured Michael Parkinson, an entertainer devoted to giving his audience everything he can and a little more, an icon whose eventual death will be greeted by a period of national mourning with his face emblazoned on the half-mast flags that'll fly compulsorily from every building in the country, could get away with murder, he could get away with electro.
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